Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Restless Desire

Daily I experience a longing that has such an intense and profound grip on my heart. This insatiable desire, like the one of the psalmist (whom some believe was King David) who wrote, “As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God. I thirst for God, the living God. When can I go and stand before him?” (Psalm 42:1-2). It is in this inconsolable longing that I have come to understand my very purpose; the purpose for which my very soul was created.

“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it (Matthew 16:24-25). Committing my life to Christ has allowed me to have a taste of what it is to fill my restless desire. By following Jesus I risk: the possibility of losing friendships, being marked by the title “holy roller” (in a bad sense), losing face with co-workers and friends when I choose to have integrity over dishonesty, and never acquiring what this world calls “wealth.” My benefits far outweigh the risks I take, even if it involves losing my physical life. In my life, whether I live or die, I want Jesus to be glorified.

My desire is to be part of the bigger story—taking up my cross daily. I want to exhibit the light Christ’s Kingdom brings to this world. I yearn to bring people to know our Father God in a real way. All the hidden choices I make, set-up God’s story. As I whole-heartedly turn from my selfish ways, I discover what it is to “find” my restless desire.
Give your Father God all that you have and He will give you all you need. Share with others what it meant for you to risk your life for Him and you begin to see your greater purpose. If you are struggling and need help making this choice, seek a strong Christian friend or pastor in your community that can guide you in the right direction.

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