Thursday, December 6, 2012

A new beginning....

When I was a child I used to wear glasses. I didn't like wearing them but I had to in order to see clearly. Eventually I got contacts and that was better but I still wished that I could see without any extra help. Eventually I had surgery on my eyes and that was such a blessing because after that I nearly had 20/20 vision...and yet. At times I still felt like my vision was a little blurry....until one day. I was in the hospital with Tina and because of everything that had been going on my emotions were high and my heart was heavy with sadness. As I sat in the silence staring out the window tears started to fill my eyes. I didn't try to hold back any of the tears or wipe them away and so they flowed freely...and then I noticed something. All of a sudden I could see clearer than ever before. Everything was so sharp and crisp and clear. I realized that the tears apparently caused some sort of refraction in how the light entered my eyes (similar to glasses or contacts). It was in that moment that I felt like God spoke to my heart and I realized that so many times in life our "vision" in clouded by things that really don't matter... and then pain enters our life and brings clarity to that which is most important....those we love and He who loves us more than we could ever imagine...our Heavenly Father.

Update: All of our prayers have been answered! Tina is finally Healed! This morning Tina took her last breath and is now dancing, running, laughing and smiling. I can just picture her running into the arms of Jesus. He runs towards her and lifts her up into the air and then spins her around and around like a little girl. Her hair is blowing, her eyes are glistening with joy, her smile is brighter and more vibrant than ever before. There are no more more more sickness. I can only imagine the wonders that she is seeing right now! Oh how I miss her already and yet my heart is at peace knowing that my Tina, my beautiful wife, the loving mother of Katie, my best friend is finally home in Heaven. I am assured of that fact because many years ago Tina gave her life to Jesus Christ and ever since then she has been a shining reflection of His love. Tina leaves behind her a LEGACY of this love that will last forever and so this is not the is a NEW BEGINNING.

I believe with all my heart that if Tina could speak to you one last time from this blog this is what she would say..."Give your heart to Jesus and He will give you life. Do it today. He will heal you like He healed me :)" Love, Tina

Praise be to God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit. Amen.

- a messenger of God, a servant of Jesus Christ and the most blessed husband and father in the world:

Aaron martin (husband of Tina Lin Martin and father to Katie Lin Martin).

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Trusting God

Today I had the chance to talk to the youth group at my church and it was such an honor. The message that God put on my heart to share with them for awhile now was about TRUST. Here are the highlights of that message:

WHO should we trust?
- We can trust others in our life that we are close to, but our greatest trust should be in God (Proverbs 3:5-6)

WHAT is trust?
- Trust is accepting God's will for our life, NO MATTER WHAT! (Luke 22:42 and Daniel 3:17-18)

- Trust is not based on how we feel (our feelings are unreliable and too changeable)

- Trust is not based on the "results" of what we pray for (God is not our ATM machine or a genie in a bottle to grant our every wish)

- Trust is not about pretending like we are fine when we are not (we need to be genuine with others and with God)

WHEN should we trust?
- Even when life doesn't make sense (Isaiah 55:8-9)

- Even when life hurts (Hebrews 11:35-39)

WHY should we trust?
- Because God loves His children (Romans 8:8-39)

HOW should we trust?
- Trust is action based and involves taking a step of faith (Saying that we trust but not acting on it is not trust at all). (Philippians 4:4-6)

RESULTS of not trusting God
- We might have false beliefs about God when He doesn't answer our prayers the way we want Him to (e.g. We falsely believe that He doesn't love us, He didn't answer our prayer because we didn't have enough faith or even that He doesn't exist)

- We become isolated from God (e.g. we get angry with Him and blame Him for our pain)

- We hold onto these false beliefs and the lies of Satan about who God is (John 8:44)

RESULTS of trusting God
- We have God's supernatural peace and security (Philippians 4:7)

Update on Tina:
- On October 9, 2012 (my 40th birthday) Tina and I went to her doctor and found out that her cancer was returning despite her treatments. Her doctors told us that she probably had 3-4 months to live
- We cried, prayed, cried out to God, fasted, kept praying and God gave us His peace
- On November 27th Tina started Hospice care here at the house
- On November 29th we were informed that Tina would probably die within the next week
- Today, December 2nd, my faith and trust in God was put to the test as I left Tina at the house to go to my church to talk to the youth group about Trusting God. The nurses could give me no guarantee that Tina would be alive when I got home.
- Although we continue to pray for a miracle, we cry out "Father not my will but Yours be done" and we pray that our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ would get all the glory in this situation whether Tina lives or dies.
- In the spite of all the pain...we continue to trust God and accept His will for our life... NO MATTER WHAT!

- aaron

Friday, November 30, 2012


There are some days I feel that I could just embrace Adversity with open arms - just trying to control it with God's strength, but other days I just want to kick it in its rear, but I know without those experiences I would not be the strong person I am today. Know that Adversity/Suffering is what gives you character, and character gives you hope...hope. (John 16:33)

This blog was hand written by Tina about 4 months ago, back on August 12, 2012 but it is just now being posted on this blog for the first time. This is the very last blog entry that Tina wrote in her journal.

Written by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: As I am typing this blog for my beautiful wife, tears are streaming down my face not because I am sad but because I am so, so proud of Tina. This blog (although it was written almost 4 months ago) came at just the right time for me. My loving Father God and Savior Jesus Christ knew that I needed to read these exact words this morning. This has been the hardest week so far for so many reasons. This has been a week overflowing with adversity and suffering...and yet, it has also been a week full of hope and joy as I can feel my Lord drawing closer and closer to my side. I will give more specific details next week in the blog but until then please keep us in your prayers. We pour out our Father's love to you.


Friday, November 23, 2012

Our Donkey

Lord, I ask that you prepare Your words for me. Holy Spirit, speak into me the works and words that lay ahead.

Hear me as I pray, O LORD. Be merciful and answer me! My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.” And my heart responds, “LORD, I am coming.” Do not turn your back on me. Do not reject your servant in anger. You have always been my helper. Don’t leave me now; don’t abandon me, O God of my salvation! Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close. (Psalm 27:7-10)

It seems it is always an uphill battle for the person with faith, while those who decide not to seek this life of struggles stay in the valley of satisfying themselves. I have learned that as a true believer I must walk in FAITH through ALL my struggles and learn to cry, fight my fleshly self and scream as I take 4 steps backwards and 3 steps forward! Ugh. Some days I just want to dismount myself off the donkey God provided for me; however, I know that it was and is a blessing to our family for we are able to be marketing advertisers for Christ from our donkey.

I pray that you too can see the blessing even when your faith doesn’t seem strong enough – know that God will never abandon you. Ask the Holy Spirit to speak and prepare your words and works for others to receive them.

This blog was hand written by Tina about 3 months ago, back on August 3, 2012 but it is just now being posted on this blog for the first time.

Written by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: This week, as in weeks past, has continued to be a roller coaster of ups and downs. Have you ever noticed that life seems to be that way? Just when everything is going "great", you get that phone call or something happens at work or in your family and then you are left wondering "what happened?" And then, just as quickly as the difficult times come, you turn around and life seems to go back to "normal" and all seems to be "well again." Well, this past week Tina has really been struggling both physically, cognitively and with bouts of pain. And the midst of all that we were able to truly give thanks yesterday for all of the amazing blessings in our life that God has given us. I pray that you too can look for and see all of the amazing blessings in your life that God has given you and that you will hold on tight to Him through all of the ups and downs in this life.


Thursday, November 15, 2012

I'm in love with your Boss!

That would be with your Heavenly Father. 1 John 4:8 "But anyone who does not love, does not know God, for God is love." Love is one of God's attributes, but Love (in and of itself) is not God.

Long ago the Lord said to Israel "I have loved you my people with an everlasting love. With an unfailing love I have drawn you to Myself." (Jeremiah 31:3)

Real Agape love is a God like quality that never refers to romantic feelings or sexual love. Only if we have God in our hearts can we have Agape love.

Someone once said "Love is selfless, humble, a service to meet the needs of another person, no matter how lowly or menial that service may seem and no matter how undeserving the recipient is of that love." As a matter of fact, in John 13:35 Jesus said "Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are My disciples."

I'm all smiles and filled with such joy to be able to say that I am in love with the boss of those who have accepted Christ as their Lord and Savior. Your boss's love just baffles me most days. For no matter what I do, He continues to love me and not only does He love me, but He forgives me and has told me and shown me the deepness of Agape love He has towards us. A love from deep within. One that is indescribable. A total love that goes beyond the depths of simple kindness or worldy love!

1 Corinthians 13:13 says that there are three things that will endure: faith, hope and love - and the greatest of these is Love.

Remember to show others your Agape love as Jesus would - no matter how menial the task or how undeserving the person seems. It is showing them how much you love their Creator and Boss. Whether it be pouring them a bowl of cereal, helping them get dressed, lying them in bed to sleep or putting on their shoes in the morning no matter how exhausted you seem to be. Now that's Agape love.

In Romans 5:5 there are all three members of the Trinity. The Father sent His Son to bridge the gap between us, and the Father and Son sent the Holy Spirit to fill our life with love and to enable us to live by His power. See also Acts 1:8

God has given us His precious and bountiful gift of Love! How can we even consider giving Him less than our best?

We have to remember that God is the Creator of all human beings and that means that we were created by Him but there is a difference between being created by Him and being born into a Family.

As Christians we should have an Agape love for our Creator and the only way to understand what that means is to deeply and most intimately seek His Word and His face on a daily basis. Be sure to prepare your heart to receive the opportunities that God will lay in front of you and be open to them.

We should have an overwhelming respect for our Father God. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge and fools despise wisdom and instruction. (Proverbs 1:7)

Our teaching pastor described fear of God as having a reverence, awe and respect to our Boss. Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in His ways (Psalms 128:1-6).

This blog was hand written by Tina about 4 months ago, back on July 17, 2012 but it is just now being posted on this blog for the first time.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: Recently my mom came into town to help out Tina, Katie and me and it has been a real blessing. Tina and I have now had more time lately to enjoy each other's company and I am loving it. Tina is continuing to struggle both physically and cognitively but as I stare deep into her eyes I am still able to see the same woman I fell in love with so many years ago.

People have asked me at times how they can help out and I always tell them that the best thing they can do is to pray and we are so thankful to have some many prayers covering our lives. In addition to prayer, I have included a hyperlink below to a Care Calendar that was setup for Tina by our friends at church. There are some practical things on there such as bringing meals and sitting with Tina. If you are interested check out the following link:

Praying that you experience the amazing Love of our Father that Tina wrote about, Aaron

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Conquering the Promised Land

The blog below was written by Tina about 4 months ago, back on July 10, 2012 but it is just now being posted for the first time.

God called Joshua to lead his people to lead the nation across the Jordan River to possess the land He had already given Israel. We too need to cross that land and have the faith that Joshua and the people of Israel had. We need to leave our old lives. We need to leave our old lives and have faith that God will continue to fulfill all that He has promised.

God will deliver us from our difficult burdens and we must be strong and courageous (Joshua 1:6-7). If we will only obey all the laws of Moses and do not turn away from them, then you will be successful in everything you do.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: It's been a pretty good week overall so far. Although Tina is still struggling both physically and cognitively her resolve to keep pressing forward inspires me. I am so blessed to call her my beautiful bride and like I told her, I would marry her all over again even knowing all of the struggles and trials that would lie ahead. I love you always Tee xoxo - Aaron

Friday, October 19, 2012

Happy Father's Day! - A Beautiful Portrait

The blog below was written by Tina about 4 months ago, back on June 15, 2012 but it is just now being posted for the first time.

My Katiebug is only four years old and I see what a gracious and precious bond that she and her Daddy have, one like I’ve never ever known before – when you see and hear them play. You can hear this angelic laughter and see the love their eyes exchange as they enjoy each other’s company. And yes her Daddy does tea parties, tutus and princesses and he is the King of our house, but Katie also recognizes that Christ is the King over all the earth including our home.

I truly enjoy watching her with her “Papa”, “Papi”, “Daddy”. Whatever the name is for the day you can truly see our Father God’s Bond that they have. I love watching her crawl into his arms, onto his shoulders and when something goes awry I love watching him “save her” and “nurture her” just as Jesus does for us – each and everyday.

I also want to remind you that those without a father today can celebrate too! Cry out to your Heavenly Father and Let Him know your deepest longings… “I do not say to you that I will request of the Father on your behalf; for the Father Himself loves you” – Jesus (John 16:26-27).

You know we as Christians have such a privilege of knowing that we can call on a Heavenly Father even when we don’t have an earthly one and our Heavenly Father loves us and is Faithful to us always and we know when we accept Him into our hearts and ask him to forgive our sins that we will always be assured that we will meet our Creator in Heaven and He will always meet our Father needs! He always takes a personal interest in our cries, our hurts, our heartaches. He loves us so much and loves to hear our laughter and loves to be close to us and near us.

If you’re a “Daddy”, “Papa”, “Papi” and know of someone that needs to hear your words to encourage them today call them up, visit them, love on them!


Your Abba Father

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: Life has truly been a whirlwind of events for us lately and God has proven to be faithful to us every step of the way. I will post more details soon. Praying that you keep your eyes on Christ each and everyday.

- A messenger of God

Friday, October 5, 2012

"I'm too young!"

The blog below was written by Tina about 2 months ago, back on June 13, 2012 but it is just now being posted for the first time.

“O Sovereign Lord,” I said, “I can’t speak for you! I’m too young!” The Lord replied, “Don’t say, ‘I’m too young,’ for you must go wherever I send you and say whatever I tell you. And don’t be afraid of the people, for I will be with you and will protect you. I, the Lord, have spoken!” Jeremiah 1:6-8

"Go get up and get dressed. Go out and tell them whatever I tell you to say....For see today I have made you strong like a fortified city that cannot be captured, like an iron pillar or a bronze wall." Jeremiah 1:17-18

I know my life is in the hands of our Creator and I know that I have nothing to fear and when my desperate times come I must remain loyal to God regardless of the circumstances. Over these past couple of weeks I have had several partial seizures which have caused significant weakness on the left side of my body and the enemy has tried to hold captive negative thoughts in my mind about always being in this condition. But I know that God's Son died on the cross for all my sickness and diseases and promised to restore all my wounds; therefore my hope and strength is in Him, no matter how bleak my circumstances look.

I don't believe that I posted details about how difficult it was for me right before surgery in February 2012. Many days I couldn't read, write, listen to others speak to me, listen to music or TV. My eyes were very sensitive to light; therefore I basically sat or laid down all day, every day for two months. This was difficult because I couldn't play with Katie knowing that she might trigger my seizures given the above symptoms. The enemy used those times to tell me that my tumor was growing and I would soon pass away.

Yesterday came to that point again, however I did not allow myself to enter nor stay in those thoughts. I know God's promises. He is my strength and when I am weak He is there to lift me up high on wings like eagles. Isaiah 40:31

Encourage someone with your Creator's words. Tell them that God has equipped them for all that He has created them for. Let them know that they have the strength God has promised them. Let them know God is giving them His words to speak to others for His direction in their lives.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: Everyday people ask me how we are doing. I always appreciate their concern although I usually don't know how to answer that question. Unless someone has experienced it firsthand, I just can't seem to find the words to describe what this is like. For example, in the update section following her blog 2 weeks ago I was praising God because Tina had not had a major seizure in over 3 months (it was back in early June that she had her last one). Well...24 hours after writing that update Tina had 2 major seizures on a Saturday morning while hanging out with Katie and myself. I was saddened and disappointed to say the least. There were no words for that moment...and yet even in that moment I found myself able to praise God in spite of this setback. I was able to praise God in spite of the apparent irony. I was able to praise God in spite of my feelings. I was able to praise God simply because He deserves my praise and I love Him no matter what! So you can see why it is so hard for me to put into a few words how we are doing. I still don't have the words....and I am still praising God :)

Friday, September 21, 2012

Distinct Tools

We must trust that God has imparted/bestowed to us the power that He wants us to have to do His will in our lives. It seems now more than ever I have to really embrace that God is using me as a tool in His ministry in individual and markedly distinct ways. Just as he called Jeremiah to confront and correct the nation of Israel in the divine call that he had received (Jeremiah 1:8). Tasks in life can seem daunting especially when we don't trust that the Lord has equipped us with all that we need.

Recently there have been moments that I felt I wouldn't rise to the task God was calling me too, even though I believed and knew that God wouldn't give me more than I could bare with His help.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: We have definitely had our share of ups and downs lately. Praise God, Tina still has not had a major seizure since earlier in the summer. She has however been struggling with extreme fatigue and weakness on the left-side of her body which makes it very difficult for her to do even ordinary daily activities like dressing and walking. This is complicated by the fact that for most of the day she is home alone because I am back at work. As a result she has had several falls lately. We are working with the insurance company on getting an aide to come out to the house for most of the day. Please keep these things in your prayers. Despite all of these challenges she doesn't complain or groan about her circumstances. That is truly amazing to me and inspires me to face each day with a grateful heart as I intentionally focus my attention on the blessings the Lord has given me. I hope this will inspire you to do the same :)

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Filling in the gaps...Agony or Ecstasy

Many times we face agonizing circumstances when we tend to want to do things our own way. We take our struggles and dilemmas into our own hands. Those are the times we can make our circumstances unbearable, just as the Israelites did in Judges 4:3 when the army of Sisera took over and oppressed them for 20 years.

The ecstasy of God comes in when we allow His eternal beams of light to shine into all our dreams, hopes and desires that we once thought were gone, as His unfailing love punctures into all the gaps in our hearts.

A few months ago it seemed like the enemy tried to surround my mind and thoughts with negativity and oppression, but God always reminded me of Isaiah 54:17 "No weapon formed against you shall prosper, And every tongue which rises against you in judgment you shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is from Me,” says the Lord.

Today share with those around you how they can live in Agony or Ecstasy by going against the will of the Lord...or following His leading.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: Tina recently found out that the cancer has remained stable, I.e. it has not grown larger or smaller in size. We are thankful for that and continue to place our hope and trust in the matter what. Please continue to pray for her energy levels as she is very fatigued and weak lately which has resulted in her falling several times...but if you know Tina you know that whenever she falls she gets right back up :)

Friday, August 17, 2012

Who Am I?

I recently had a friend that was upset and deeply disappointed and hurt because they were not invited to an event that they felt they should have been privy to.

I suppose as human beings we think we are number one! We constantly think of only ourselves. We want to feel like we are important. For us women, we want to be the prettiest and most stylish. For you men, you want to be the champions, the winners, associated with the elite and higher class.

Now back to the story about my friend. After a day of sulking and mulling over the situation, they finally spoke to Christ about changing their heart and outlook on the situation so as not to become bitter or angry....and Christ's response to them was "I'm not invited to many occasions to which I wish I could be invited to."

Well that seemed to end that conversation quickly and quietly. It quickly dissipated and suddenly an overwhelming peace came over my friend as they realized that the Lord of the Earth cared to know their name and feel their hurt (as it says in the song by Casting Crowns entitled "Who Am I").

Not because of who I am, but because of what You've done, Not because of what I've done, but because of who You are. I am a flower quickly fading, here today and gone tomorrow. A wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind...

I just thank God that regardless of what sin I commit, whether it be pride, anger or bitterness that He always watches over me. So who am I to feel that I have the right to feel like I should be privy to certain situations when my God isn't even invited? Although He is omnipresent, omniscient and omnipotent He is not always called upon.

I pray that you will bring the struggles you are facing today to our Savior's attention and call upon Him for His forgiveness and help.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Update: We have been doing better lately. Tina has had fewer large seizures over the summer and she is getting stronger with the help of some in-home occupational and physical therapy. We are so thankful for all your continued prayers and for the Lord's grace and strength He gives us each and every day that we call upon Him.

Current prayer needs: I am going back to work on Monday and Tina's mom will be going back home in 2 weeks. Tina hopefully will be receiving some support from a home health aide but that will only be for 1 hour a day. Please pray that Tina will continue to get stronger and more independent so that she can take care of herself during the day (going to the restroom, walking without falling, getting something to eat etc...). Please also pray for my family in Georgia as they are grieving the loss of my younger cousin Adam who recently died. I have so many wonderful memories of our childhood summers together and he will be missed dearly, although it warms my heart to know that he and my younger brother Jeremy are now hanging out in heaven.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Uniquely Yours

A while back Aaron and I watched a cooking show called "Food Network Star". At the end of the show the judges consider all the chefs and their abilities and ultimately who is the chef that will move on from the panel of competing chefs.

Apparently we missed the beginning of the episode where each of the chefs presented their "style" of what their cooking show might look like. At the end of the show one of the judges commented to one of the chefs that they weren't really sure who the "genuine person" of this chef truly was considering that he portrayed one personality on stage (a rapper) and a different one when presenting his dish in a casual outside environment, i.e. he was a different person. Upon being questioned, it seemed he had struggled with this same issue his entire life. Of "who he truly was" he mentioned that he didn't genuinely know who he truly was as an individual.

In Psalm 139:14, David writes "I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made...". You see, God wove us together before the beginning of the Earth; all of our days were ordained for us; however, we must choose what Romans 12:2 says by not "conforming" to what we think this world wants us to be for we were created to be unique. Allow God to transform you into the unique, wonderful and individual person He created you to be (Psalm 139).

Don't allow yourself to conform to what you feel others want or to what others perceive that you should be. If you live your life in this way you'll always feel as if you have a void that you need to feel.

For you are one of a kind. You are special. You are unique. Only you can be you. When you deny who you were truly made to be, you deny God the opportunity to shape you to be "uniquely yours" in a powerful and mighty way.

Share your unique talents and gifts with others today. Maybe then they can discover their own unique and individual selves and not feel as though they have to conform to the ways of this world.

Update: Tina has been doing a little better overall the past few weeks, e.g. less seizures and fewer symptoms but she still struggles with very limited mobility, weakness and other cognitive/physical difficulties. I am writing this, Tina is getting chemo at MDA. We just got the results today that the cancer has remained stable, i.e. it hasn't regressed or progressed. We were hoping that it would have regressed more but at the end of the day we remember that Tina's health and life are in the hands of her Healer and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Forgiveness....Part 2

After typing Tina's recent blog entitled "Forgiveness" for her I realized that God put something on my heart to add to it...

Recently I have been teaching my daughter Katie about the concept of forgiveness and how Jesus forgave all of our sins and as Katie likes to put it "He takes all of our bad stuff away when we ask Him too". Well, the other morning I confess that I allowed myself to get upset because Katie kept calling out again and again for my attention but I was busy helping Tina so I raised my voice and told her to wait. A few seconds later I raised my voice again, this time not in anger but in an attempt for her to hear me since she was halfway across the house. I called out to her and told her that I was sorry and to please forgive me. There was a slight pause and then I heard a small angelic voice say "It's ok daddy." A little while later I was helping her brush her teeth and I asked her again to please forgive me for yelling at her and to my surprise she smiled and said "Daddy....don't you remember this morning??" At first I was puzzled because I remembered what I had done wrong...but then I remembered what happened afterwards. "Ohh do you mean that I don't need to ask you to forgive me again because I already asked you to forgive me this morning? She looked up at me and sweetly smiled and said "Yes, of course Daddy." The concept of forgiveness made perfect sense to her at the age of 4. And Jesus said "unless you become like little children you shall not enter the kingdom of Heaven." Matthew 18:3

Have you ever been there before? You do something wrong and then you ask God to forgive you but for some reason you feel like you have to keep asking for His forgiveness. Well I have been there plenty of times, especially when I feel like I have "really blown it". This moment in time with my 4 year old reminded me that when we come to God and ask Him to forgive us that He does so willingly, graciously and immediately. So my encouragement for you today is... when you ask Jesus to forgive you, immediately receive His forgiveness, ask Him to help you from doing it again and then leave your burdens at the cross where they belong.

Update: Tina has had one seizure and a lot of fatigue and weakness this past week but she has not had any serious side effects from the new chemo. Praise God! We are so grateful to Him for each and every day He blesses us with :)

- A messenger of God

Thursday, June 7, 2012


Those who seek God's forgiveness are spared eternal judgment.

Remember that God speaks to you not only through your times of prosperity but through your times in the desert. Many times it is in the desert that you draw nearer to Him. For it is then that you seek and cry out for Him the most. For we require His love and mercy. It is in His righteousness that you will be restored.

I love the song lyrics to the song "At the foot of the cross" by Don Moen. He so elegantly speaks the truth about how we should portray Jesus. He says "trade these ashes (our sins) in for beauty, and wear forgiveness like a crown."

The next lyrics portray an image to me about the entirety of our existence when he says "coming to kiss the feet of mercy, I lay every burden down." All of our filth and unrighteousness is forgiven by Christ. He allows us to give up our burdens and forgive others as He has forgiven us, as Christ sees us as beautiful and precious to Him. We too should see others through His eyes no matter the circumstances. "Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." (Ephesians 4:32)

I know it isn't always easy; however, we must remind ourselves that Christ does it for us on a daily basis. We aren't Christ, be we were made in His image.

Life can be hurtful, discouraging and dreadful at times but always remember...Forgiveness is needed to bear the burden off our shoulders and onto Christ's. For that is why we must "lay every burden down at the foot of the cross".

Blog was composed by Tina and typed by Aaron.

Update: These past few weeks seemed to have been more difficult than usual. Tina has been having more seizures than usual (several a week) and she is very weak on the entire left side of her body. Her last MRI showed that the Avastin appears to be still working by shrinking the tumor overall, however a small portion of the tumor has crept over to the other side of her brain (across the midline). Due to this, her doctor recommended that she start a second chemotherapy medication this weekend in order to be a little more aggressive in the treatment protocol. The medication is called Temodar and it is supposed to have much milder side effects than other chemo agents. Please continue to keep us in your prayers: Tina - meds will continue to kill the cancer cells completely with minimal to no harmful side effects and that her left side would get stronger and NO more seizures, Katie - she will continue to remain bubbly and filled with the Joy of Christ as God continues to protect her eyes and heart during this, me - God will continue to give me the strength emotionally, mentally and spiritually to care for my family, all 3 of us - that God would continue to allow us to bring Him glory through this trial. Love, Aaron.

Saturday, May 26, 2012


The time is coming when everything will be revealed. All that is secret will be made public. Whatever you have said will be heard in the light and whatever you have whispered behind closed doors will be shouted from the housetops for all to hear (Luke 12:2).

You spread out our sins before You, our secret sins, and You see them all (Psalm 90:8).

"Can anyone hide from Me? Am I not everywhere in all the heavens and the Earth?" asks the Lord (Jeremiah 23:24).

So be careful not to jump to conclusions before the Lord returns as to whether someone is faithful. When the Lord comes, He will bring our deepest secrets to light and will reveal our private motives. And then God will give to everyone whatever praise is due (I Corinthians 4:5).

For the word of God is full of living power. It is sharper than the sharpest knife, cutting deep into our innermost thoughts and desires. It exposes us for what we really are. Nothing in all of creation can hide from Him. Everything is naked and exposed before His eyes. This is the God to whom we must explain all that we have done (Hebrews 4:12-13).

Lord I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against You (Psalm 119:11).

Many of us are living the life that the Samaritan woman lived in John 4. For she had deep secrets that lied within her soul. After Jesus asked for her to "Please give me a drink" (John 4:7) she was shocked that a Jew was asking or even just talking to her for Jews in those days looked down at the Samaritans (because they were considered to be a mixed race). Jesus then promised her that He would quench the thirst deep within her soul. He tells her to "Go and get your husband". She tells him "I don't have a husband" and Jesus replied "You're right, you don't have a husband. For you have had five now and aren't even married to the man you are living with now" (John 4:17-18).

Jesus brought up this woman's past, however regardless of what she had done He loved her and offered her eternal life. The Samaritans in the town believed Jesus was the Messiah because they heard Him themselves, not just because this woman told them about her testimony.

Once she knew her testimony had been exposed, she was set free from all her secrets.

In my own life I know I have had secrets that had held me captive for years. I once read "You're only as sick as your secrets. If you have a list of secrets, you are really sick."

Over the years I have learned to let go of many of my secrets for they fiercely hindered my relationships with some of my dearest and loved friends and they truly burdened my heart, but once I let God's flashlight shine in the deepest crevices of my heart, I allowed my deepest secrets to be my life's saving grace.

Today allow God to relieve you of your burdens. Allow Him to give you the courage to open your heart to those things that are hindering you. Allow Him to expose your deepest secrets to help you set yourself free and bring you closer to Him, for He is your ultimate saving water, just like the Samaritan woman. God is omnipresent (all places), omnipotent (all powerful) and omniscient (all knowing).

Share these thoughts with those around you. You may help someone set themselves free from being captive to their deepest secrets.

Update: I have been really fatigued lately and my physical strength on my left side has been weaker than usual. I have also had a few more seizures since last week. Not really sure why. We just got an MRI done yesterday and we will get the results on Tuesday. Please keep this in your prayers. Recently we were reminded that despite any difficulties we may face in life we need to always start our day by looking unto our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and He will give us the strength that we need for that day.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012


Every miracle begins with an act of faith. We must be obedient to the acts God calls us to, even though we may not see the end solution. We must also not underestimate the power of faith.

I once read that "faith is the step between promise and reassurance." I do believe that God requires us to trust Him to remain faithful to the promises He has given us.

We as believers may wax and wane when we don't seem to receive what we thought would presumably occur. However, God says that His ways are "higher than the Earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55:8-10)

Many days I thank God that His ways are always higher than my ways. For the days I take those steps of faith I see God's miracles. Whether big or small, there is always one there.

When I stand back and look at my life and see my little girl and the love between Aaron and me; I just thank God and stand in awe of His perfect miracles.

Share your faith and everyday view of the miracles that God has placed in your life. Maybe someone in your world needs the empty void in their life to be filled with your words of encouragement and hope. For that gift of hope will return to you in full measure, pressed down and shaken together to make room for more. (Luke 6:38).

Update: I am continuing to remain stable over the past few weeks. I have only had a few seizures which I think were due to me being overly fatigued one occasion and forgetting my meds on another occasion. Despite those minor setbacks I am still hopeful that I am getting better every single day. Please pray that I am able to push myself to regain my strength and physical abilities without overdoing it and causing a seizure. Aaron and I continue to be totally amazed, overwhelemd and humbled by the generosity and support of our friends, family and co-workers. We love you so much and pray that God returns a thousand fold blessing to each and every one of you in the ways that you need it most.

Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Rainbow Promises

Overall we all have our ups and downs. We're human by the way. God has been so gracious in sending support our way in many shapes and forms.

Each day is a personal day from the Lord for His word has given us countless promises and when we seek His face and search for an intimate relationship with Him He will pour out blessings we cannot contain.

One of God's eternal promises to us was that He would never again flood the Earth to destroy all flesh (Genesis 9:13-15). The rainbows we see after the rain are a constant reminder to us to be encouraged and hopeful that no matter what vain imaginations the enemy tries to throw at us, God backs His promises and keeps us from the fiery darts of the enemy. For God is always our eternal rock (Isaiah 26:4b).

This morning God truly gave me a supernatural peace. These past few months have been quite difficult and exhausting, e.g. being in the hospital, recovery and many days of downs both emotionally and physically. BUT, God's rainbow promises have kept us going. "Lord, grant us peace, all we really have is from You." (Isaiah 26:12). I can't tell you how many times we prayed this prayer.

In your moments of desperation cry out to God, "Lord, You are my strength and my song. You have given me the victory over this situation. You are my God. I will praise You. My Father's God, and I will exalt You!"

I pray that you lean on God's rainbow promises today. No matter how difficult and bleak circumstances look, know that Jesus is right there with you, walking with you. I challenge you today to find other rainbow promises He has given us and share those with others.

Update: I have still had my ups and downs over the past several weeks. Due to a change in my meds I had quite a few seizures last week and had to go into the ER over the weekend. But they changed my meds and this week I am doing better.

- Composed by Tina and typed by Aaron.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Cruise Control

Several years ago there was a song about Jesus taking the wheel. Do you remember that? Well, whether or not that was one of your favorite songs I imagine that it may have caused you to stop and think. "Who is in the driver's seat of my life?" Over the past several years this question has come to my mind many times, especially lately. If you are anything like me you like to feel like you have some control of your life and what does or doesn't happen to you. Well I have learned that while I do have some limited ability to steer my "ship" through the "seas of life", ultimately I have no control of the winds, waves and weather. Only God is in charge of those! To some this idea may seem frightening or discouraging but for me it brings a reassurance for two main reasons.

#1 God loves me. Since I have asked Jesus to come into my heart, this has been a reality to me. Just like the song I sang as a child still echoes in my mind. I know that Jesus loves me because the bible tells me so.

#2 God is in control. Like the verse in 1 Chronicles 29:11 so clearly states, God is Lord of everything. "Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the splendour, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, O LORD, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all."

Therefore, if God loves me and He is in control of everything...I can choose to sit back, relax and trust that He is guiding and directing everything in my life for my good as I release control to Him and cruise through the "seas of life". This isn't always easy but with God I can.

Update: Overall Tina has been doing a little better over the past 2 weeks since she started her Avastin injections although she has been having a lot of difficulty with sleep again due to the steroids she has been taking. Continued sleep deprivation (as you may have encountered) affects every area of your life and it has been causing some difficult side effects for both of us, but God has been faithful to rejuvenate us and give us His supernatural strength to carry on. Please pray that her sleep gets better and we will also be praying that God gives you His supernatural strength when you need it as you release control of your life to Him.

- A messenger of God

Friday, March 30, 2012

Life's instruction manual...

Have you ever tried to put something together without using the manual. Guys are notorious for this. We look at the parts in the box and then at the picture on the box and assume we got it. Well, this happened to me about a week ago. A dear friend of ours came over to hang out with Tina while Katie and I went to a Daddy/Daughter dance (it was awesome by the way). When we got home our friend left only to return a few minutes later with a flat tire. "I got it", I said as I walked out to her car. About 30 minutes later as I was laying under her car I was feeling a little frustrated and had to ask her to help. She got the manual and it turned out that I was missing a crucial part. After I located this missing part the job was done in about 5 minutes.

This reminds me of life. So often in life we (myself included) go around saying "I got it" only to wind up feeling frustrated later. But it doesn't have to be that way. God gave us an instruction manual for life. It's called the Holy Bible. If we will admit that we need help and turn to His Word we will find that we will find the answers to life's questions and that even when life is frustrating we don't have to feel that way. So, if you are feeling frustrated today by life's challenges take some time to pick up the best instruction manual ever written, God's Holy Word. If you are not sure where to start, I would recommend starting in John (New Testament) as well as Psalms and/or Proverbs (Old Testament).

Related verse: "All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness..."
2 Timothy 3:16

Update: It has been about 1 week since Tina had her Avastin treatment and she will have another week sometime late next week. She appears to be doing better at times although she is still struggling with extreme weakness on her left side, shakiness, some sensitivity to light and sound and difficulty sleeping through the night. But...we still keep looking to God and His word for our comfort and for direction and guidance for our lives.

- A messenger of God

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Follow my voice...

Have you ever got up in the middle of the night in search of water or the restroom and noticed how difficult it is to see without any light? You search and grasp for something to hold onto and for some sense of direction. Well, in our house one of our favorite family rituals is to read Katie a bedtime story and then rock her before she goes to sleep. As we finished reading her story tonight she walked over to grab her favorite blanket and pillow and then proceeded to turn out the light. And then...there was silence and no movement for a moment. Although I couldn't see her I could sense that she was trying to locate where I was. She stopped and called out "Daddy I can't see you." As any loving father would do I reassured her and said "Katie, I am right here. Follow my voice." A second later she was snuggled up warm and cozy in her daddy's arms.

Have you ever felt like you were walking blindly through life? Constantly grasping for some sense of direction, not sure of which way to turn, not knowing what lies ahead in your future...I have. Been there, done that, got the hat. doesn't have to be that way. God clearly tells us in the Bible that if we will listen to His voice that He will guide us and direct us. Check out what Jesus said in John 10:27 "My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me." That means, if we are in Christ that we can have direction in life and in the darkest of times when we feel scared, lonely and directionless if we listen closely to His voice it will lead us to His loving and comforting arms.

Update: Tina and I have had a pretty rough week. We got news this past Tuesday that the cancer that was removed one month ago with surgery has already returned. But...we serve a mighty and powerful God who reminds us daily that He is well able to take care of us. Additionally, Tina is also scheduled to start some treatments with Avastin tomorrow and we are confident and hopeful that she will be feeling better really soon. Please keep this in your prayers. Earlier this evening Tina was feeling exhausted from the day and was wearing her eyemask to help block out any light to avoid any sensory overload. Since she was unable to see, she was relying on me to help walk her around and at one point she stood still and seemed hesitant to take a step forward. It was in that moment that I leaned close to her and gently whispered in her ear..."Tina, I am right here. Follow my voice." :)

- A messenger of God

Friday, March 9, 2012

You know me...

I have been reminded lately about how a relationship with someone builds intimacy. A dictionary defined intimacy as "close familiarity or friendship; closeness; a private cozy atmosphere." Have you ever noticed that as you get to know someone better that it seems as if they can read your mind and vice versa. You finish each other's sentences, laugh about shared memories and seem to know what the other person needs without them even having to ask. The bible tells us that our Father God in Heaven longs to have an intimate relationship with us. A closeness. A friendship. Check out this verse...“No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15

So how do we form intimacy with someone? Simple. By spending time with them. The more time you spend with them, the closer you become. It's the same with God. If we want a closeness with God then we need to spend time with Him...reading His word, talking to Him, praising Him through song and with our life.

How can you grow closer to God today?

Update: Over the past several years as I have spent more and more time caring for and attending to Tina, our level of intimacy has grown very deep. Last night Tina had another really big seizure. As a kneeled by her during the seizure I knew exactly what she needed from me in that moment. Later that night as we were going to sleep she whispered some encouraging words in my ear to uplift me and remind me that we can get through this together. She knew what I needed as well :) We chuckled and we both said "Yep, this is just a little bump in the road."

As you read this blog join Tina and I as we continue to praise and worship our Father God through all the bumps in the road.

- A messenger of God

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Step by step...

Swaying back and forth, about to fall, having to hold onto furniture with every step but giving it every ounce of effort she can. i remember the first time our beautiful baby girl Katherine (we call her Katie) took her first steps. It really was amazing for me to watch. As her cute little chubby legs wobbled back and forth it appeared as if she was just about to fall forward at any given moment as she tried to place one foot in front of the other. As she became older she got stronger and one step turned into two steps and along the way she had her fair share of falls...but she kept getting back up. She never sat down, pouted and said "this is too hard" or "I am just going to give up because I keep falling down". Nope! She just kept on getting up and going forward. Katie is almost four and it is hard for us to keep both of her feet on the ground now as she swings, jumps, leaps and dances about. i am so proud of that little girl. She is my princess and as her daddy i love to cheer her on and say "Go Katie" or "Great twirl" and when she falls i reach down to pick her up and say "It's ok baby, Daddy's here" or "No big deal, let's get back up."

Did you know that our Heavenly Father treats His children the same way? He cheers us on "Go _________" and even though we are grown now, we still fall down at times (i tend to on a daily basis). But when we place our trust in God he is faithful to reach down when we fall and encourage us to get back up and remind us that "It's ok _________, Daddy's here."

Update: Swaying back and forth, about to fall, having to hold onto furniture with every step but giving it every ounce of effort she can. Tina is slowly but surely gaining her strength back on the left side of her body and i am so proud of how hard she is working and just like Katie whenever she falls she gets right back up and keeps pressing forward. Through this journey Tina is learning to trust God both physically and spiritually as she takes each step by step...

My prayer today is that you and i will learn to trust our Heavenly Father to lead us and guide us in this life with every step we take and like Katie and Tina we will keep pressing forward and get back up each and every time we fall.

Here are some scriptures to contemplate:

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
Philipians 3: 12-14

"The LORD helps the fallen and lifts those bent beneath their loads".
Psalm 145:14

- A messenger of God

Friday, February 24, 2012

First things first...

You ever felt like a chicken runnin around with your head cut off? Ok read that again and imagine me saying that with a real twangy kuntry voice. Someone somewhere told me that they are really able to do that. Anyways, sorry for the graphic poultry descriptor, but i thought it was a perfect example for our lives sometimes. This morning as i was running around the house trying to take care of Tina and Katie and meet all of their needs i found myself getting really irritable and grouchy. i then had this amazing ah ha moment...Although i love serving my beautiful wife and daughter, i had not taken the time to spend some alone time with God yet. i know from past experiences that when i don't take at least 5 minutes (minimum) early in the morning to sit, relax and fellowship with my God that the rest of my day will pay for it. So, i made myself stop, sit down and i opened up my bible and i started reading. i then listened to some praise and worship music by Bethel Live (amazing stuff!). Literally within a minute or two i physically felt all the stress, tension and irritability leaving me. Ahhhhhh. In Proverbs 3:6 it says "In everything you do, put God first, and He will direct you and crown your efforts with success." My prayer is that both you and i would always remember to put God first in our life through our time, energy, thoughts, finances etc...

Update: We came home from the hospital this week and overall we are doing well. Tina still has her up's and down's but there are definitely more up's lately. She is receiving home based physical, occupational and speech therapy and i told her that i would offer her some free psychological services but she passed :) For now we rest in the Powerful, Unwavering, Almighty hands of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

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- A messenger of God

Thursday, February 16, 2012

A Different View...

When i am flying i love sitting in the window seat so i can look out in wonder at God's awesome creation. Have you noticed how different the view is from up above as opposed to being on the ground? i recently had this experience at the hospital. Tina and i have traveled back and forth through the medical center dozens and dozens of times over the past several years and fought many battles on these grounds. After seeing the same scenery over and over it tends to become routine...until you get a different view of things. The other day Tina and i stood on the 24th floor of MD Anderson looking out over the Houston horizon. As i looked down on the medical center i noticed how different things looked from that view (e.g. i could see things i had never seen before and i could see more clearly how things interconnected). It was in that moment that i felt God speaking to my heart and saying "Aaron, this is how I see things...from up above, not how you see only see things from your level but I AM able to see ALL things and how they work together for My purpose." This experience reminds me of the verse in Isaiah 55: 8-9 that says "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts."

When you see me please encourage me (and i will encourage you) to daily seek to see things from a different view...God's view. We can do this by daily reading His word, talking to Him and pursuing our Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus with our whole heart.

Update: Tina has had a week full of up's (walking, eating well, laughter and smiles, dressing herself, sharing a romantic dinner with me on the 24th floor overlooking a sparkling lit up downtown panorama) and down's (more nausea, throwing up, pain, GI problems and a seizure) and to be honest this "roller coaster" is making my head dizzy...BUT God continues to hold our hands during these times and reminds us to look to Him so that we may see all of this through His eyes :)

In the name of Jesus Christ.

- A messenger of God

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Thursday, February 9, 2012

Jars of Clay...

When I was much younger I made a ceramic mug at my school. When I started it was just a lump of clay, but when I was done shaping and molding the clay it was a new creation. I then learned that in order for it to be "useful" the teacher had to place it in a kiln to fire it. This reminds me of the verse in 2 Corinthians 4:7 that states "But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us." Just like that lump of clay, when we give our life to Christ he will shape us and mold us into a new creation...and just like that mug in order to be "useful" for Christ we as His followers will often go through many fiery trials in our lifetime. Check out this verse in 1 Peter 4:12-13 "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed." I am also reminded of the concept that in order for a sword to be made sound it has to be placed into a refining fire to make it strong. During this season in our life, Tina and I know full well the pain that a fiery trial can bring....BUT we also know full well that our God is making us stronger through this and we feel so honored that He is using us as we share in His sufferings.

Reflection for you and me: Are we allowing God to use us for His glory and for His purpose? Are we just "pretty" jars sitting on a shelf (expecting only health, wealth and a lifetime free of any "inconvenience") or are we willing to go through fiery trials so that we can be vessels of His mercy and love used to bring refreshment to a thirsty world?

Update: Tina is doing much better today. Her pain and nausea are under control and she has been sleeping well too. She has also been doing well in her physical, occupational and speech therapy. Despite the continued trials we are doing well. We really are. In fact, just a few moments ago Tina and I were laughing hysterically about an inside joke that only she and I will ever know about :)

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p.s. This blog was inspired by Tina's blog entitled Broken Jar dated 8-4-2011. Go check it out and many of the other amazing blogs that she and God wrote together.

- A messenger of God

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Like no one else can....

Have you ever had to sit and watch someone you love go through pain? Watching someone you love go through pain (physical, emotional, etc) is a terribly difficult experience especially if you feel like there is little you can do to relieve their pain. It makes me wonder what God was thinking/feeling as He watched His own Son go through the Passion or suffering from the garden to the cross. Can you even imagine?? I have a beautiful 3 year old princess and I cringe when she scrapes her little knee. But...God loved us SO much that he choose to let His Son suffer for you and I. That is amazing love!

Update: Tina has really been suffering a lot the past 2 days with bouts of pain in her back/neck and head so intense that it causes nausea & vomiting, in addition to gastrointestinal issues, lack of sleep, fatigue, allergic reactions to medications and on and on... It has been very challenging for me to watch this knowing that despite all my efforts there is little I can do to relieve her pain, yet even now God is encouraging me and reminding me that He understands her pain and my pain perfectly. So I remind myself that the greatest thing that I can do is to pray for her knowing that her loving Heavenly Father is watching over her and caring for her like no one else can...and knowing that, my heart is filled with His hope and joy confident that she will be victorious in this battle :)

Verse which inspires me: "For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need" (Hebrews 4:15-16)

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- A messenger of God

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Wondering why...

Have you ever asked the question: "Why does God allow suffering?" or "Why me?" or "Why now God?" If you have, you are not alone. These questions have been asked innumerable times before. Consider the following passage in 2 Corinthians 2:3-4 that states "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God." Did you get that? That's an answer to the "why" question. I realize it may not be the only answer to these difficult questions in every case, but nonetheless it definitely is an answer for many of us at times if we are open to the possibility. When we as Christians suffer, God comforts us and then when we see someone else who is suffering we can share God's comfort with them. Now that's really cool! What troubles are you facing right now? Have you ever stopped to think of your "troubles" as a blessing? Ok...don't stop reading..I am not crazy ;) The next time trouble comes knocking at your door...think "Ok God teach me to grow from this so I can encourage someone else" and then after you have gone thru it and hopefully grown from it, keep your eyes wide open for someone who is going thru the same trouble and reach out to them with God's love.

Update: Tina is doing much, much better today. She is eating, sitting for short periods of time and even walking to the restroom with assistance. Her pain levels are under control and she is tolerating more light and sound. Praise God! Thank you for all your powerful prayers. If you are facing a "trouble" right now that you could use some prayer for please let me know so we can keep you in our prayers as well.

Prayer needs: Pray that God continues to send people into our life who are hurting and who share similar stories to our own and that we would be a vessel of God's mercy, love and comfort to them in a very real way.

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- A messenger of God

Friday, February 3, 2012

Battle weary...

Have you ever been in a fight before? I am not proud to admit it but I have to confess that I was in a physical fight as a young boy. Long story short I was in elementary school and another boy kept saying nasty comments about my momma during recess even though I told him to I "settled it" with him at the park after school "once and for all". Looking back on it I know I should have handled it differently, but I also stop and reflect on how that fight was so momentary compared to the "battles" we face in life. Maybe the battle you are facing today is an ongoing relationship difficulty, a financial hardship or a health issue similar to Tina. Whatever the battle may be, if it is a noble and God honoring one, I want to encourage you to never, ever, ever give up and to let God fight the battle for you. I hope the following verses inspire you:

"...Thus saith the LORD unto you, Be not afraid nor dismayed...for the battle is not yours but God's." 2 Chronicles 20:15

"Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ..." 2 Corinthians 2:14

Update: As I write these words I am still recovering from a very long and difficult night with Tina. I don't want to focus on all the details of it so I will just say that we are both "battle weary"...but God refreshes us and gives us His strength to carry on :)

Things to keep in prayer: Tina is still VERY hypersensitive to light and sounds which causes her brain to go "haywire" and she is also in a lot of pain frequently throughout the day. Finally, please keep next Monday in your prayers that we receive fantastic news on her lab work ups.

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- A messenger of God

Thursday, February 2, 2012


Some of the two most powerful words that have ever been spoken are..."Talitha cumi". Unless you are fluent in Aramaic you may not know what these two words mean. In Mark 5:41 Jesus spoke these two words to a little girl that had died but He declared emphatically that she was only sleeping. These two words mean "Little girl, Arise!". Well...although I can't prove it I would like to think that Jesus whispered these same words to Tina as she just awoke from surgery. "Tina, Arise"! She is now awake and doing great! Praise God :)

More updates to come tomorrow...

If there is anyone reading this who may be "sleeping" spiritually I believe that Jesus would speak those same two words to you. "Arise ___________"!

If you do not know the amazing love of Christ give your heart to Him today and awake to your new life in Him! :)

If you haven't seen the video Tina did recently you can check it out @

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- A messenger of God

Puzzle Pieces...

The big day is finally here and I know it may sound strange but Tina and I are very excited about it. If you are asking yourself "Why would anyone be excited about brain surgery?"...well it's because from the beginning we placed our lives and desires in the Hands of God and told Him that no matter what, we would follow His as we are preparing for neurosurgery we simply see this as just another step forward in His awesome plan for our lives. Tina put it perfectly many years ago when she described our lives as a puzzle. It you put your face too close to it then all you can see is just the individual "pieces", but as you back away and get God's perspective on it you can see the "puzzle of perfection".

Details: Check-in time is 10:30am. Surgery is scheduled for around noon. Miracle is already in progress :)

I will try to post more updates later today or tomorrow.

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- A messenger of God

Saturday, January 28, 2012

When words fail...

Have you ever wanted to tell somebody something but the words just wouldn't come out right? Over the past several days there has been several times when Tina was so fatigued that the slightest sound or gleam of light would cause her brain to become so overstimulated that she would start to twitch, her face would start to tingle and her brain would tetter on the brink of seizing at any moment. It was in those moments that that she would have to wear ear plugs, an eye mask and sit in a dark room with no one talking. This was very difficult for me because I wanted to talk to her and encourage her but I was unable to...However...we found another way to communicate. I would hold her hand gently and "speak" to her with my hand gestures. For example, when I was able to speak to her I told her that if I ever kissed her hand and held it to my face that it meant..."I love are my best friend...I am here for you...I will never leave you nor forsake you" so when those moments came and she felt all alone in that dark room all I needed to do was kiss her hand and hold it to my face and in that moment no words needed to be spoken because she already KNEW in her heart what I was saying....

That is exactly what Jesus does for us. When we place our life in his HANDS he holds us close and speaks to our hearts and even in the darkest of times His voice cries out to us "I love are my best friend...I am here for you...I will never leave you nor forsake you."

Update: We saw the neurosurgeon today and Tina is scheduled to have her MRI's next Wednesday and her surgery next Thursday. Eventually Tina would love to have visitors but on the day of the surgery we are only allowing our immediate family to go back and see her (without speaking) to allow her to rest and recover. When she is able to have visitors I will post it on the blog.

May the love of Christ "speak" to your heart today :)

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- A messenger of God

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Messages from God...

Have you ever felt like God was delivering a message especically just for you? I mean...maybe it was a song on the radio, a billboard, a hug from a friend or a sermon from your pastor that came just at the right time. Well...check this out. Over the past several days Tina has had various nurses working with her at MD Anderson and I believe that God especially picked two just for us. When we first got there one of her nurses name's was Comfort! After we were there a few days and were feeling tired the night nurse told us that the morning nurse's name would be Mercy. Can you believe that! Mercy would be coming in the morning! It just reminded me that God's mercies are new for us each and every day when we seek and trust Him.

Ok so here is the latest update as of Thursday, January 26th. Tina has been released from the hospital and is resting here at the house (the hospital indicated that she had to be released before she could see the neurosurgeon in his clinic so thank God she was stable enough to come home). She had a rough night last night (hypersensitive to any noise, lights, etc..) but is resting today in a very low stimulation environment and is doing much better. We are scheduled to go see her neurogsurgeon tomorrow morning @ 9am and her surgery is tenatively scheduled for next Thursday, Feb. 2nd., but we will find out for sure tomorrow. We are hoping and believing for a supernatural healing although ultimiately we have placed the entire situation in God's almighty hands and have bowed our knee and desires to His will.

More updates to come later...

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- A messenger of God

Tuesday, January 24, 2012


We got the news today that we will meet with the neurosurgeon this Friday and schedule Tina's surgery for next week God willing. In the meantime the main focus is to keep her stable and seizure free so they have increased her anti-seizure meds and given her a new med as well. We will give you more updates after our appointment this Friday.

Through this entire experience I have to come to appreciate more and more each and every day that God has given me and all of the amazing blessings I have in my life. It' a PERSPECTIVE thing. This past month in our youth group at Thrive church, ONE Youth, we asked the question how would your life be different if you had one month to live? What would you do? What would you value? I challenge you to ask yourself those questions as you are reading this. We have faith that God is Tina's Healer and that she will have 1000's of more months to live but Tina has already got this PERSPECTIVE and lives her life full of gratitude, joy and hope living everyday like it is her last. Wow!

Doesn't that sound like the way you want to live your life? Well...if you were to ask Tina how she is capable of such PERSPECTIVE she would humbly's not's Jesus who lives inside me:)

Does He live inside you?

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- A messenger of God

Monday, January 23, 2012


I just realized that I didn't give you any chain of events in the last blog so here goes bullet point style...before Christmas Tina had a large seizure and the doctors saw a spot on her brain that they couldn't identify for certain...for the month following she was unable to sleep more than 1-2 hours a night due to the steroids she was on to decrease the swelling in her brain...she felt fatigued and worn out everyday but her hope and spirit was joyful...last Thursday and Friday she had several grand mal seizures so I took her to the ER @ MD Anderson and they admitted her on Saturday...they increased her meds a lot and she is currently resting and....

Have you ever had to wait for something and you think to much longer? Well...we are still waiting to see the neurosurgeon. They are waiting until Tina is seizure free to proceed so that is something you can be praying about.

Speaking about waiting it reminds me of Tina's favorite verse in Isaiah 40:31 which says "...those who wait on the LORD will find new strength. They will fly high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint." So if you find yourself waiting on something in your life remember that when you wait and allow the Lord to work in your situation that He will renew you and give you His strength.

By the way if you are wondering about our little Katie bug...God has protected her from all of this and she has never seen Tina have a seizure in the past 3 years and she is bubbling over with 3 year old wonder and joy, for example after visiting her mommy on Sunday at MDA she walked away smiling and singing 'Jesus Loves Me' through the hallways of the hospital :)

p.s If you are interested in helping out in some way you can sign up to help with meals, house cleaning etc... at

Recipient Last Name: martin
Password: 6524

- A messenger of God

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Sunday, January 22, 2012

JOY in spite of...

Ok this is aaron posting on Tina's blog for the 1st time. Tonight will be short and sweet with more to come later...Tina is resting well in her room at MD Anderson. We will see the neurosurgeon tomorrow to schedule her surgery @ MD Anderson. If you are interested in helping out in some way I believe someone at Thrive church is going to create a care calendar for sign-ups for meals, rides etc...I will post a link to that when it's created. If you are interested in visiting please text Corie @ 713-775-3082 and she will let you know if and when Tina is able to have visitors. The best thing anyone can do for us right now is to praise and thank God in advance that Jesus Christ is her Healer and that He will get all the glory, and honor and praise through this. Amen!

We have His JOY in spite of our circumstances :)

-- A messenger of God

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