Thursday, April 28, 2011

The Great Lasers...a change in plans

The Radiologist's office called yesterday and mentioned that they needed to change my appointment from 9 a.m. to 1:45 p.m. today. After some prodding as to why the change in my schedule. The gentleman on the other end, stumbled through his words and eventually stated that the only available opening they had on a "particular" machine was at that time.

I'm not sure if I mentioned previously that the radiation oncologist told us that they would only conduct one scan (which was conducted last Thursday) prior to the radiation treatment and base all of my treatments off of that single scan due to me having a slow growing tumor. One of my concerns was "what if something changed and they radiated a spot that did not need to be treated?" It was at that point that we had to relinquish control and say, "Lord, let your will be done, not mine." (Matthew 26:39) All that to say, God was (not that He hadn't been) in the driver's seat! The phone call was to let me know that the "particular" machine they are assigning me to, will be conducting scans on a daily basis to monitor exactly where my treatments need to be.

Whew, I was relieved to hear that! A friend of mine reminded me last night that God knew that it would be one thing less on my plate that I would think about. Ultimately, for me, one less thing the enemy could use against me...to cause doubt in my mind.

For me, I felt God gently turning my face towards Him as He said to me in a Daddy's gentle whisper, "Listen. Relax, my beloved I've got the "great lasers" of heaven pointed on you. Just sit and allow my incredible peace to permeate you." As Jesus says in the book of John "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." (John 14:27)

Today don't allow fear, sin, or uncertainty to steal the peace of God from within you. For God's peace is what keeps away the world's hostile forces (e.g. fear, doubt, sin, etc) and it offers us comfort and relaxation. But remember, you must accept and receive the peace that He gives you. I pray that you have a wonderful, relaxing, and peaceful day, knowing that God's plans are always for your good! He Loves You very much!

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Don't worry, Be happy...

In every life we have some trouble
When you worry you make it double
Don't worry, be happy...

Most of us out there have heard this song. Oh how there is so much truth in these words. As simple as they sound, they are true. God was the original author of these words. In Phillipians 4: 6, He says, "Don't worry about anything, instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done."

We all know that as simple as that sounds, it doesn't always seem that easy. In fact, at times, it almost seems impossible! Paul's advice to us is to turn our worries into prayers. In essence, whenever you begin to worry, stop and pray to God and thank him for all that he has done for you.

I do have to mention, the difference between happiness and joy. Happiness often times is based on our circumstances. When things are going well, finances are in place, your health is good, and maybe you are even happy while enjoying an extravagant vacation. In contrast to happiness, is joy. Joy runs much deeper and stronger than the surface circumstances that we face on a daily basis. Joy is the quiet, confident assurance of God's love and work in our life--the assurance that He will be there no matter what! Happiness is based on our circumstances, Joy is our dependence upon Christ.

The other part of that verse says, "In every life we have some trouble, when you worry you make it double." This verse reminded me of the struggle Aaron and I have both thought about over the past few days. We have thought about whether or not we made the right decision about radiation. Which in turn has caused some doubt in our minds and seemingly made us worry more about whether or not it was the "right" decision. God's word says, "Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than the birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? (Luke 12:24-26)"

As Aaron and I conversated last night, ultimately, we came into agreement that whatever decision we had made, God would honor it and protect me from anything that might harm me. We have to ultimately trust in God that the decisions we make, are what we have peace about and then give those decisions up to God. God will guard and protect you as they play out. For worrying does us no good and only doubles our trouble. We must not worry, but pray and ask God what we need and thank him for it.

Whether it is that you need peace about a decision you are making, are maybe it is that you are worried about your relationships, your job, your children and decisions they are making about their future, or even about your family's decision to turn their face away from God. God assures us that He will take care of it all. Make the decision to cast your cares upon Him today, so that you can walk in peace and joy in your life.

Over the past few days, God has impressed upon my heart to ask of you and those you know, who will truly stand in agreement with us in Christ against any negative side effects from radiation.

Pray specifically (if you can) at the time that I will receive my treatments. Thursday (April 28th) at 9 a.m. I will be receiving my first treatment. From there I will have to update you as to the next times that I will receive my treatments (as we want to change them to the late afternoon). Here are the specific possible early and late reactions (a.k.a. side effects) that could occur as a result of this procedure: Early Reactions: 1)Skin and scalp reaction with redness, irritation, scaling, blistering, ulceration change in color, thickening, hair loss 2)nausea, vomiting, headaches 3) fatigue, drowsiness 4) altered sense of taste or smell 5) Inflammation of ear canal, feeling of "stopped-up" ear, hearing loss, dizziness 6) depression of blood count leading to increased risk of infection and/or bleeding Late Reactions: 1)Permanent hair loss of variable degrees, altered re-growth texture, and color of hair 2) Persistent drowsiness 3) Brain damage causing a loss of some degree of thinking ability or memory, or personality changes 4) Scarring of Skin 5)Spinal cord or nerve damage causing loss of strength, feeling or coordination in ay part of the body 6) Damage to the eye or optic nerve causing loss of vision 7) Ear damage causing dryness of ear canal, fluid collection in middle ear, hearing loss 8) Possiblity of second cancers developing in the irradiated area.

I know that it is a "laundry list" of possible side effects; however, I know where two or more are gathered, Christ will hear our prayers. There is so much power in prayer and believers in agreement with one another. Please consider as often as possible to be praying. For I know that we serve a big God and Your prayers will make a difference! Please feel free to share with others this blog so that they too may pray.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Chapter 3...A New Beginning

For here lies an added chapter to the journey that God begun. On Friday we went to the consultation for the radiation oncologist and as expected, they did recommend that I receive radiation as my next step.

Even though, I have been hesitant of this process, God has reassured me and been there time and time again; therefore, I know that this is where I am to be.

For many, I hope and pray that yesterday (Resurrection day) was an eye opening experience. I pray that because Jesus rose again, it assured you that the LORD will fulfill all He has promised.

Over the past couple of years, I have learned how important it is to to read the Word, to know that promises that it holds. I have learned that if you don't know what God has promised you, then how is it that you can know what He wants for your life? If you know God's Word and His promises, then you can gain hope and encouragement in knowing that God's word does not lie. It is truth and no matter how hard the enemy tries to combat the truth by filling your head with doubt and thoughts that don't line up with God's word, you don't have to receive it, for when you read and know His word, it is then that you can have peace!

I have confessed and stood on many scriptures and promises that God has made me. In Hebrews 10:23 it says, "Let us hold fast to the confession of hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful." Jesus death on the cross signifies that He bore our sins AND our sicknesses. Isaiah 53:5 says, "But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed." In Dodie Osteen's book, "Healed of Cancer," she explains how anything that causes you heartache, whether it be poverty, oppression, depression, pain, or suffering, that Jesus bore all of that on the cross; therefore, there is no need for us to bear it. We must cast our cares upon Christ and let him know that what we may be going through is overwhelming at times, but that we thank him for taking away our sicknesses and heartaches.

"For I will restore health to you and heal you of your wounds (Jeremiah 30:17)" God has promised to restore my health [and yours]. There has been many times, especially over the past two weeks, where I have had symptoms (seizures, nausea, dizziness, and tingling in my face) that have caused me to doubt [in my head, not my heart] that I am completely and totally healed. This scripture continues to remind me of God's sovereignty over my life. In those moments I also find strength in God's word by saying, "Let the weak say I am strong (Joel 3:10).

Lately, I have had to battle with fear. When I met with the neurooncologist and they performed their usual, routine neurological examinations and questioned me about my recent health. I knew that I wasn't functioning where I was supposed to be. I could see it on the nurse practioner's face, that things were not good. Also, when I met with the radiation oncologist, she basically told me that the benefits of conducting the radiation, outweighed the risks; whatever those risks entailed, she was basically telling me that it didn't matter. That brought some doubts and fears into my mind. She gave me a laundry list (at least it seemed that way to me) of "possible" early and late "reactions" (a.k.a. side effects).

I have now used what the enemy meant for evil and turned it to good. I see the "list" as a powerful weapon on what to exactly I can pray against. I have prayed against each of those side effects on that list! I have chosen to meditate on scriptures like, "It is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure (Phillipians 2:13)." "With long life, I will satisfy you and give you my salvation (Psalm 91:16).

These words are what encourage my heart and give me hope that God will fulfill all that He has promised me. I remind him on a daily basis, that of which he has promised. Not so much because he doesn't know or has forgotten, but more so to remind myself and to encourage myself of what I have to look forward to.

On Thursday (April 28th) at 9 a.m., I will begin my "new beginning," for I know that God will use this radiation treatment for my good. I know that He is purposeful in his actions and that with God's word firmly established in me...I cannot be shaken!

I pray that today you find God's promises for you in His word. Look up scriptures to help you be a fighter in your faith! Find particular scriptures that apply to your specific situation that you are trying to conquer. Allow God's word to encourage your heart, to bring you peace, and more than anything hope that "this too shall pass."

Sunday, April 24, 2011

A Thunderous Applause...

is in place for the KING IS RISEN!

Three days ago we commemorated the suffering and death of Christ on the cross. Today we celebrate His resurrection, the day that Jesus rose from the dead.

Imagine being Mary Magdalene at the foot of the cross when Jesus died. It probably seemed to her that all hope was lost because Jesus had died. Yet three days later, she came to Jesus's tomb to find that the stone that covered the entrance had been rolled away. She was heartbroken and thought someone had taken Christ's body out of the tomb. Peter and another disciple stopped and looked in to see the linen cloth wrappings lying there that had once covered Jesus. After that they realized, that the Scriptures said that Jesus would rise from the dead, had come true.

Mary stood outside Jesus' tomb weeping, she was approached by two angels sitting at the head and foot of the place where Jesus' body had been lying. They asked why she was crying and she said, "Because they have taken my Lord and I don't know where they have put him." She glanced over her shoulder and saw someone standing beside her. It was Jesus but she didn't recognize him, "Why are you crying?" asked Jesus. "Who are you looking for?" She then told the man if you have taken him away, tell me where you have put him and I will go and get him.

"Mary!" Jesus said. For then she turned to him and exclaimed, "Teacher!" Can you imagine at that moment, the joy that she felt to have seen Jesus and to know that He was alive? She went from utter hopelessness to an undescribable joy in three days time. Wow, imagine being there with Jesus in that moment...what joy you would have!

Jesus' resurrection is the key to the Christian faith. For just as he said, Jesus rose from the dead; therefore, this assures us that he will accomplish all he has promised. His death proved that the Father was satisfied with the Son’s payment for our sins. Now we can know that our sins are forgiven and we’re eternally secure.

Jesus promised us that we, too, will be resurrected and given new bodies. Physical death could not hold Him, nor will it overpower us. Because He overcame the grave, this means the bible's words are true and that Christ can and will fulfill His every word!

Celebrate today with an applause, sing praises to your risen King, and give glory to his name. Share with others the joy you have found as you commit your life to Christ and devote yourself to serving him all the days of your life.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Good Friday...The Passion of Christ

Today we (Christians) commemorate the Passion of Christ (i.e. the period of intense suffering in the life of Jesus from the Garden of Gethsemane to the crucifixion).

What does it truly mean to be passionate? Wester's dictionary defines Passion as an "intense, driving, or overmastering feeling or conviction."
Christ's passion was His love for us. His love resulted in a committment to redeem us and restore our relationship with God by making himself nothing, taking on a humble position of a servant in human form. (Phillipians 2:6-7)Christ's passion for us caused him to voluntarily lay aside His divine rights and privileges out of love in order to live an obedient life to fulfill God's plan of salvation for us.

Some days I wonder, how is it that Jesusvoluntarilysuffered for me; He allowed himself to be whipped and beaten so that I wouldn't have to face eternal death. He lived his life perfectly knowing that in the end He would ultimately die for others. Jesus set out to accomplish the plan of our Father. Jesus lived every moment in the presence of our Father God. His every thought, word and action was given to him by the Father (John 14:31).

Over the years I have come to know that Jesus's passion and dedication for God's purpose in His life was able to come to fruition because His every moment was lived on the dependence of God.

What would our lives look like if we spent our every moment in dependence of God's promises for us. We would live a life free of anxieties, worries, and fear. Our lives would exemplify Galatians 5:22-23, "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control."

Spend today reflecting on the sacrifice that Christ made for you. Think of what God's passion looks like in your life. Find ways to serve and praise Christ today. May you dedicate your life to His service today!

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Here I am to Worship...

Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that You're my God
You're altogether lovely
Altogether worthy
Altogether wonderful to me

These are the words to a song that touches my heart and soul everytime I hear them. They remind me to praise and worship God for all He has done for me. In Psalm 103 David reminds us to praise our Father God for forgiving us of ALL of our sins, for healing us of our diseases (Praise God for that one!), for redeeming us from death (I can check that one off my list too!), for crowning us with love and compassion, for filling our lives with good things, renewing our youth like the eagle's, and many more blessings for which we can set our eyes upon.

"Worship" in Hebrew literally means "to kneel" or "to bow down." Worshipping is an act or gesture of humbling oneself before a mighty authority (our Father God). The Lord simply desires that you worship him and that you praise Him; for He is truly wonderful and worthy of praise.

When it seems that your life's journey is too difficult and it seems there is nothing else you can do...remember to always count your blessings, read over David's list and remind yourself of what God has done for you! Do as Psalm 103:1 says, "Praise the LORD, I tell myself; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name.

Take time today to ask God what "worship" looks like for you today. It could just be writing a note to someone you care about and letting them know how much they mean to you, or singing at the top of your lungs in your car to songs that exalt God (this would be me :)), and/or telling others about who Jesus is and what He did for you on the cross. Your Father God loves you very much! Honor Him by praising and worshipping Him.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Celebrate.

From day to day I pray and thank God for every day, I thank Him for all that He has done for me, for my life, for blessing me, for blessing my family and for the very air that I breathe. I do however forget to consciously make an effort to thank and celebrate the very people that God has placed in my life to take care of me, encourage me, and support me on a daily basis. Psalm 107 was written to celebrate the Jews' return from their exile in Babylon. It begins by saying, "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good!His faithful love endures forever." I love the fact that inspite of our forgetfulness to thank Him, He continues to love us. I pray that we can all have the same mindset of Christ.

This week is "Celebrate Caregivers" week at M.D. Anderson. Today I want to exemplify what Christ has done for me, I want to proclaim His greatness, and let the whole world know of His goodness (I Chronicles 16:8). I want to honor my husband today and thank him for his faithful love and caregiving.

Aaron you are such an incredible bestfriend, husband and father. I thank God that He gave you to me. There are days I think to myself, "Where would I be without you?" Only God could have brought us together. He knew what he had in store for you and he knew that it would be you that could handle all of these things that we have been through, but only through His strength.

I thank you for never leaving my side. You have never once left me overnight through any of my hospitalizations, never once! I now know how much of an expert you are in figuring out how to open up the hospital recliners and turn them into beds. You always have "your" bed ready before the nurses can even blink an eye (LOL). (That is when you know you've had to much experience in hospitals). Thank you for ever so faithfully taking care of Katie and me. I know there have been many moments that have been difficult for you, but regardless you continue to persevere. I thank you that you have stood by my side and had confidence that I was listening to my spirit in regards to the decisions that I have made with my treatments. I know these past several months have been difficult for you to stand on the sidelines, have no control over situations, and to watch God patiently move in our lives. Thank you for holding down our household, taking care of Katie and me. I know that I am a full-time job in and of myself, but thank you for faithfully serving me as Christ would.

Today Aaron I celebrate you! You are the bestest friend, father and husband anyone could ever have! God faithfully provided for Katie and me; I thank him for that.

Take time to celebrate the special someone's in your life. Let them know how much you appreciate them for all that they do. But most of all thank God, for His faithful love endures forever.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

I am your offering...

I have been reminded over the past week time and time again of what Christ bore on the cross for us. It was our weaknesses he carried, it was our sorrows that weighed him down, he was wounded and crushed for our sins, he was beaten that we may be healed (Isaiah 53:4-5). God sacrificied His one and only son, so that we may have life, life more abundantly. Christ was God's chosen servant, the ultimate sacrifice.

After having this past week to be reminded of God's peace, I was super excited when I received the phone call from the radiation department yesterday (I know it sounds cRaZy that I was actually excited!). I felt like a kid in a candy shop that had been waiting all day (in my case a week) to eat the candy they had bought. They told me my consultation appointment would be on Friday (22nd) at 9 a.m. I thought to myself...why does it have to be so far away...why can't today be Thursday? I soon got over that and was excited just to have the appointment scheduled. I know that God has a purpose for His timing, for His timing is always perfect.

One of my best friends called me the other day and told me that she played (as loud as she could in her car) the song "Life Light Up" by Christy Nockels. That put a huge smile on my face. It is one of my favorite songs. Here are some of the lyrics to the song...

With You, I can go anywhere
I can do anything
You are the song I bring...

With You, You are the air I breathe
'Cause You are my everything
And I am Your offering...

I may live and I may die
Either way You're glorified
Bless the day I give my life away!

Let my life light up like the city lights
And let it burn for You in the darkest night

In You, I can begin again
I'm part of a bigger plan
'Cause You are the Great I Am!

It reminds me, especially during the trials in my life, why it is that I am alive and the purpose that Jesus has for my life on this earth. Jesus is my everything, He is the air that I breathe, I am His offering on this earth. I want to glorify Him through all that I am. I want to be the light to the darkness in our fallen world. I often say, "Whatever it takes Lord and if this is the way that you need to use me, then do it!" Now don't think for one minute that I sometimes don't want to take those words back...because there are moments that I want to. There are moments that I cry, I am frustrated, I am angry that I am going through this difficulty or that difficulty. And I do ask myself, "Why Lord, Why is this happening? or why do I have to do this, or that?"

It is then in those moments (maybe several moments later :)) that I am reminded that God is in control, He is the "great I am" and He ultimately reigns. He has chosen me as part of a bigger plan. A plan greater than I could ever imagine. A plan that reminds me that I am His offering.

Let the Spirit who gives life, shine through your life today. Allow your Father God to be praised today by your offering. Whether that be a smile you give someone to brighten up their day or taking five minutes to spend in God's word or maybe even sacrificing your time and resources to someone in need. Let your light shine upon others today. If you are especially having a hard day today, God will honor your sacrifice and bring you peace by the offering that you have chosen to give today.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

The Rage of the Seas...

Ugh! Ugh! Ugh! Aarrggghhh! and then anger and frustration. Those are the words and emotions that ran rampant in me for the past couple of days. I go through moments of peace and then I begin to allow the enemy to steal my peace by dwelling on the dreaded words, "radiation is the only choice." Those were the words of my neurooncologist on Tuesday.

He told Aaron and me that the cancer was spreading and that he could only offer us radiation as the next step. Even though I know God had prepared my heart for that moment throughout this past week; it seemed as if those words just pierced my heart to hear them from Dr. Yung's mouth. Maybe some part of me just wanted to be in denial of what I felt God was speaking to me. Maybe it was that I was hoping that Dr. Yung would just tell me that the cancer was gone, but whatever the case, Tuesday's conversation was not one that was pleasant for us.

Now that I am in the midst of this raging sea, I am reminded in Psalm 29:10-11 "The LORD rules over the floodwaters. The LORD reigns as king forever. The LORD gives his people strength. The LORD blesses them with peace."

I have had to go back and read my previous blogs to remind myself of how God has revealed His mighty power through miracles in my life. To remind me of how faithful He has been to His promises and to remind me that the same power that raised Christ from the dead is available to help me in my daily struggles.

Even though I have felt angry and frustrated because this choice was not one that I ever wanted to be a consideration, but it is the path that we chose to go down. I have chosen to draw strength from my Father God. I have chosen to not fear or worry through this difficult trial, but to pray about everything, tell God what I need, and then thank Him for all He has done in my life (Philipians 4:6). For by doing this I can experience what Philipians 4:7 speaks of, "God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand."

Speaking of true peace=God's peace. God's peace is different from worldly peace for it is not found in positive thinking, in absence of conflict, nor in good feelings. It comes from knowing that God is in control of all things, every situation, every trial, and every wave that may come raging upon you. Our Father God is there to guide your every step and to give you wisdom and true peace. Allow His peace to guard your heart and mind as you go through trials and tribulations today.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

My Shepherd

This morning I will be visiting my neurooncologist's office. I'm not really sure how I feel about this appointment. If you don't already know, this past month has been and up and down month; given that I have been in the hospital twice (once for something unrelated to this cancer thing and the second due to a grandmal seizure). From what the neurologist at the hospital said I have swelling in my brain; more so on my right side than my left. So today I will see what Dr. Yung has to say about all of this. I can honestly say that I have a supernatural peace about it, but at the same time (given my human nature) I feel in this moment that I "need" to know what he has determined will be the next step in this journey. I feel at moments...some anxiety and fear about "what is next," but then God reminds me as I read in this verse from Isaiah, "He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart" (Isaiah 40:11).

When I read these words, I was reminded that my Daddy is always watching out over me and he gives me the privilege of crawling into His arms and laying my head on His chest. I am reminded, as a shepherd guides his sheep, so my Father in heaven is guiding my steps, protecting me, and giving me His provision.

In Psalm 23, David describes the Lord as being his shepherd. David spent many of his early years as a shepherd watching out over his own flock. The sheep are completely dependent upon the shepherd to guide them. As the Lord is our shepherd; so we are his sheep. As these verses in Psalm 23 describe what Jesus is to us, allow them to also give you God's peace, knowing that He is leading you, guiding you, and refreshing your soul.

"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake."

My prayer for you (and me) today is that you allow yourself to be in peace when the storms of life try to take over. And when you feel yourself crawling down from the lap of your Father God to chase after the troubles in this life; gather yourself back into His arms and allow Him to hold you, to carry you, to guide you, to protect you, and to give you His peace.

Monday, April 4, 2011

My refuge and my strength

I love to read Psalm 46. It reminds me that God is always there to help, providing refuge, security, strength, and peace. His power is complete and His word is forever. This Psalm reminded me of the recent events in Japan where so many have lost their shelter [refuge] due to the recent earthquakes. "So we will not fear, even if earthquakes come and the mountains crumble into the sea (Psalm 46:2)" Through these words it reminds me that no matter what is happening around me I can always count on my God to be there in my times of trouble.

When we face trials and are in the midst of a storm, God will help give us confidence and quiet our hearts. I have to continue to keep these words in the forefront of my mind over and over again. This past week I had a severe seizure where I had to be admitted into the hospital for a few days. The end result from the neurologist there basically said that the right side of my brain is pretty swollen and the left side is a little less. Given that news, he was basically gave me medications to help the swelling stay down and referred me back to my neurooncologist. I will not see my neuroocologist until April 12th. At the moment it seems like it it light years away. It has shaken up our world a bit for a few moments, but then it is words like these that remind me that there can be a calm and peace in the midst of my storm. "Be merciful and gracious to me, O God, be merciful and gracious to me, for my soul takes refuge and finds shelter and confidence in You; yes, in the shadow of Your wings will I take refuge and be confident until calamities and destructive storms are passed.—Psalm 57:1

God reminds us that we can take refuge in the shadows of his wings and still rejoice because we can be confident that He will be there until our storms have passed. I have had to remind myself of this these past few days. Kathie Pelton says this in her writings, " The enemy loves to come in stormy seasons of our lives to try to steal our perspective. He loves to taunt us with a sense of being uncovered and left without shelter. The enemy is eager to accuse God of breaking His promises and abandoning us in our times of need. It is very easy in the middle of a storm to lose our perspective and begin to doubt."

It can be very easy to lose perspective in the midst of the storm, but know that I AM is always your strength and refuge in times of trouble.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Perfect Faithfulness...

In Paul's letters to Timothy he truly encourages Timothy to keep strong, to be bold, to be faithful, despite the circumstances and suffering that he may have to endure. He also encouraged Timothy to not only carry the torch of truth, but to also invest in others, so that they may also one day serve in passing on Christ's doctrine and mission. God put this verse on my heart yesterday morning as a rememberance of the "Timothy's" in my life. "I remember your genuine faith, for you share the faith that first filled your grandmother Lois and your mother, Eunice. And I know that same faith continues strong in you. 6 This is why I remind you to fan into flames the spiritual gift God gave you when I laid my hands on you. 7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:5-7).

It really encouraged me to remain solid in the foundation that was set before me by my mother and before her, my grandmother. Those foundations are legacies that came from those before me. God reminded me to continue to "fan into the flames" the gifts he has given me; These past few weeks, have been a trying and difficult time for us; however, God constantly shows up and shows off. He has given us the strength, love, power, and discipline to continue standing strong in the faithful promises of Jesus.

He also reminded me that He always completes His promises. Like Isaiah these words ring true in my very heart, "O Lord, You are my God; I will exalt You and praise Your name, for in perfect faithfulness You have done marvelous things, things planned long ago (Isaiah 25:1).

Lord especially in the midst of the storm, You are truly my foundation! For your son was sacrificied that I and all others may have life and life abundantly. I declare that no matter what attacks the enemy has planned against me that you will use them for my good, to perfect Your will in my life, and to sharpen the sword that you have given me. For even though, everyday, especially lately, life can be a struggle. I praise you and am reminded of your faithful promises.